Monday, June 29, 2009

I think I may be trying to kill myself!!

Ok, not really but it sure feels like it. I went from basically staying at home to working 2 jobs in the span of a couple weeks. I have been PRN in Pathology for about a year now, every since I stopped working there full time. They rarely need me that often and I'm fine with that! Well, Jase and I had kind of decided that I should look for something part time just to help us out in the money department so I applied for a part time over night job at the hospital monitoring the heart patients. I got the job. Yay! But then they started needing me basically full time in
Histo for the summer while one of the other techs was off for surgery and chemo. My hours will eventually drop of there, but for now I am doing both jobs and it is NOT fun. The paychecks are great, but I am a walking zombie! I pretty much just lay in bed and nurse Elliot :) Jason has been really awesome about keeping up the laundry (even the diapers!) and the dishes and taking care of the kids. I really hate that this had to happen over the summer when all the boys are out of school and we could be doing so much fun stuff. Oh well, I guess life is all about sacrifices. I just hope I'm sacrificing the right things. Right now I am writing this blog at 4:30am. I've been at work since 6:30 pm last night and when I get of at 7am, I am going straight into the lab to work all morning. I hope I don't fall asleep and cut my nose off on the microtome.....

Monday, May 25, 2009

Update on My Kiddos!

Life is super hectic right now (just right now??), and sometimes my blog is the first thing to get neglected. SO how about a short update on each of the kiddos?? :

Brodie: He just turned 6 and is 3.5 days away from being a 1st grader! *sniff* He's also playing t-ball at church and is having fun even though he didn't think he was going to!

Deacon: Deacon is done with his first year of pre-k! He is going to be going to Children's Mercy in August to have a sleep study done. He is still snoring a lot and having apnea at night. I hope we can get something figured out!

Truman: Truman is also done with his first year of pre-k! He continues to be my most crazy and free spirited child! I have been working on seeing that as a positive, which really it is!

Sawyer: He is having a language explosion right now! Saying new words and phrases everyday! "excuse me", "baseball", "grandma", "thank you", "what's that?" and many other things!

Elliot: She is at a really cute age!! She talks and coos all the time and smiles at everybody. She's trying to start rolling. She is the most fussy and demanding baby we have ever had, but I think we'll keep her :)

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Having a daughter

Having a daughter is the most wonderful feeling in the world. When we had our sonogram and found out we were going to be blessed with a little girl., I was so nervous! I loved my boys, I loved being a mom of all boys, and I really felt like I had this whole boy thing down pat. I was nervous about how a girl would effect our family dynamic. All of that went out the door the moment she was laid on my chest after she was born. I felt such an immediate, strong, deep bond with her. It is different than with my sons. Not better or worse, just different. I had always been kind of jealous of the fact that Jason had this unspoken bond with the boys because they were all guys. No matter how close I am to my sons, I am their mom....I'm not a guy! But now I have this precious, beautiful little daughter, I just want to protect her and tell her everything will be OK and that I'll be there for her through everything because I've done it all before. I am just looking forward to watching her grow up and building on our relationship even more.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Happy Earth Day!

I hope everyone had a great Earth Day :) What a great day to take time and really think about what we are doing to our planet. I talk to the kids a lot about the environment and how it is our responsibility to take care of what God has given us. Also, having a large family I feel like it is my extra responsibility to do what I can to save the Earth since I have put so many new people on it :) There are lots more things I would love to do (get a hybrid car, grow my own fruit and veggies, make my own bread) but I think we do pretty well! Here is a lost of the things we do to take care of mother earth :

*use cloth diapers and wipes
*use cloth napkins (we don't use paper towels or paper napkins at all)
*use only environmentally friendly cleaners
*try to buy as much local food as we can
*recycle what we can (i'm working on doing more!)
*don't drink bottled water (all 6 of us, except Elliot, have our own reusable aluminum water bottles)
*use reusable shopping bags
*use compact florescent light bulbs
*i breastfeed (no formula cans or bottle liners to throw away)
*i make all my own baby food (again, no trash to throw away)

That's all I can think of right off of the top of my head! The things we do are cheap and easy, anyone could do them! I encourage everyone to take a look at their lives and try to find some way to cut back!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

A Joyous Easter!

What a wonderful holiday! Celebrating the single greatest even in the history of time! We had a fun and busy weekend!

Friday I took all 5 kiddos to Penney's to get Easter pics done. This was their first professional pics sine Elliot has been born. I took my grandma with me for some extra help, but really didn't need it. They were all so good and we got 1 good shot! That's all I ask! That evening we went over to my mom and dad's to see what the Easter bunny had left for the kids there.

Saturday I had choir practice at church from 8-12. We got to take a break around 10 to go over for the all church Easter egg hunt! The kids had so much fun! Well, the boys had fun.... Elliot slept :) That evening we went over to Jason's sister's house for a cook out and another Eater egg hunt. It was nice visiting with them and the boys had fun playing with their cousins.

Today the boys got up pretty early to see what the Easter bunny had left for them. I had to be at church early for choir so I rode with my dad. Jason got ALL 5 kids ready by himself and got them to church! He's pretty awesome like that :) Church was amazing! This was the first time I had ever sang in the choir and it was such a cool experience. It was very moving and I will do it again in a heartbeat. It was nice to reflect on the true meaning of this holiday and just thank God for all He has done for me. Afterwards it was off to lunch at my grandma and grandpa's for lunch and hanging out with my family. I've been blessed with a truly wonderful family and I love them all so much!

OK, quick funny story..... I bought a new dress, shoes, jewelry, everything, for Easter. Well, until this morning I didn't really take into account how the heck I was going to nurse Elliot in a one piece dress with no buttons in front! Whoops! So, during the sermon I had to go into the handicap stall in the bathroom, unzip my dress and take down the whole top of it!! So there I was sitting on a toilet, with the top of my dress pulled down nursing Elliot. Real classy!! I didn't think stripping down like that would be appropriate for the cry room :)

Monday, March 30, 2009

Whew....5 kids is A LOT!

So, I'm still getting into the swing of having 5 kids!! Jason just went back to work this past week after being home for 3 weeks with us. It was really nice having him home b/c we all just kind of hung out and did whatever we wanted to. I'll admit, I was kind of glad for him to go back to work. I do miss him a lot, but now that he is working I am finding my own routine being home with all 5 of this kiddos all day! It is really going pretty well and we already have a pretty good routine worked out. I am just in awe of the amount of laundry that 7 people can make!!! I was already doing laundry everyday anyway, but now it's not really an option. Once you factor in clothes, jammies, undies, socks not to mention towels and cloth diapers it adds up! Just the normal daily running of the household takes up a huge part of my day! Once breakfast is cleaned up, kids are dressed, and kids are dropped off it's time to start lunch and laundry and dishes and before you know it it is time to get Brodie, make dinner, do baths, and get ready for bed! Honestly though, I love it! I love being home with the kids, I love being here for every minute of their lives. It is HARD, and there are times when I just want to cry because I am so overwhelmed but the good always outweighs the bad. We'll find our way!! We are getting there!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

She is here!

~Elliot Wren~
born 3/4/09 @ 5:23pm
8lb 5oz / 21.5 inches

Friday I had a regular OB appointment and when my doc checked me I was a 2. She said we can schedulke and appointment for a week away or go ahead and schedule an induction for Wednesday (which is when she was on call). I would be officially 1 day past my due date at that point so I said yes to the induction. The fear of a huge baby outweighed my fear of another painful induction.

So we checked into the hospital at 6:30 am on Wednesday morning. I got in my gown, they did my IV, and got my antibiotics going (since I was GBS+). My doc came in right away and checked me and I was a 3.5!! Woo-hoo!! She said that she could not break my water until I had had a full bag of antiobiotics but we could go ahead and start the pitocin. That stuff started working FAST!!! My nurse (who was awesome!) hooked the bag of pit up and before she even got out the door I had my first contraction. They came pretty regularly from then on, but were not nearly as painful as I remember from the last time. Around 9 or so, my mom and dad came out with the boys. I was so glad to see them!!! Them being there really helped take my mind off of my contractions.

Around noon, my doc came into check me again and now I was about a 5-6 and she said if I want my epidural to do it now. So I said to bring it on! I didn't want to wait to long and then not get it! So the anesthesiologist came in and he was WONDERFUL!! Best epidural I have had! He was very fast about it, I didn't feel any pain, and it worked perfectly! I was not too numb, but numb enough to feel good! After that I took a nap, the boys left for the waiting room, and Jason and I kind of settled in for the next part of labor.

I came on a CRAZY day! There were twins about to be born. The mom was right ahead of me. The rest fo teh rooms were full as well so they were kind of short staffed. There were also 3 deaths on the ward that day which was very sad So, they decided they wanted to kind of hold me off if they could until thos twins were born b/c if we went at the same time there would not have been enough baby nurses to go around!! I was fine with that! My labor was progressing and I was relaxed so I was fine with that! Once the twins were born, my doc came to check me and break my water. I was at an 8!!! Once she broke my water things went FAST and HARD!! I knew they would I went from an 8 to a 10 in about 20 minutes and the pressure to push was more intense than I had ever felt before with the other kiddos. It was the most painful transition I had ever experienced! They got my in the stirups to push and I think I pushed about 3 times! She HURT coming out though! Worse than any of the boys! She was born at 5:23pm. I was so relived when they laid her on my chest and Jason cut the cord. She was beautiful!!! She looked just like Sawyer when he was born except with a head full of dark hair!! All my other boys were baldies for a long time! I had no tearing and needed no stitches which made recovery a BREEZE! She weighed 8lb 5oz which is over a pound smaller than Sawyer was I nursed her about 45 minutes after she was born and she took to it like a pro!

The boys were the first to come in and meet their sister. The looks on their faces when they came into the room were precious, I will remember it the rest of my life Overall, I had a wonderful birth experience! I'm so glad she is here and my family feels complete now.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Wednesday is the day!

By Wednesday evening, I will be holding my daughter in my arms!!! I cannot believe how fast this pregnancy has flown by and that it is already time for her to be here! My doc is on call on Wednesday and told me to come on in to be induced. I'm not REAL thrilled about being induced, but also I don't want to go too far past my due date and have another huge baby like Sawyer because that was NOT fun!! I'm just so nervous about birth and anxious to meet my little girl. The boys are so excited, too. They were literally jumping up and down when I told them that she would be here on Wednesday. They are all such good boys and I know they will all be great big brothers to Elliot. I just still can't wrap my mind around the fact that I am going to have a daughter! It seems so unreal. I guess it will seem a lot more real once she is here :)

Friday, February 20, 2009

Our first experience with stitches

Sawyer had to get stitches yesterday. Believe it or not, this is our first experience with stitches!! It's hard to believe that with 4 boys who are all boy and love to wrestle, be physical, and get wild that we have not been to the ER more! I am thankful for that though :) So anyway, Jason and I dropped Brodie off at school and then took Deacon and Truman to pre-school and came back home. When we got inside, I headed into the kitchen to make some coffee and Jason was helping Sawyer out of his coat. I was in the kitchen when I heard Jason say, "Oh, my God!" and I could tell by the tone of his voice that something had happened. That's when I heard Sawyer start crying so I ran in to the front room. Jason is down on the floor holding Sawyer and blood is just pouring out of his head. You know how head wounds bleed A LOT! Jason was pretty much freaking out, but I asked him what happened. He was helping Sawyer out of his coat when Sawyer kind of twisted and tripped and hit his head right on the hinges of our computer desk. Once I got it wiped off and cleaned up and saw that it was pretty deep, we thought we better go have it looked at. We tried urgent care but they won't do head wounds on kids under 5 so we were off to the ER. We got right in and the doctor was so nice! The worst part was having to hold him down while they put the liquid stitches on, he did NOT like that!! Once that was over, I picked him up and he fell asleep on my shoulder. Poor guy, he had had a rough morning! I honestly think the whole thing was the worst for Jason. He was pretty much freaking out and he feels horrible about the whole thing since he was right there when it happened. Sawyer seems to be back to himself though. I'm sure this won't be our last trip to the ER, but I hope it is our last one for a while!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

The Plan

I've been praying and thinking a lot about my purpose in life. Yes, I'm supposed to be a wife and mother and I love those 2 jobs! They are my main focus, after God, and I realize that nothing in my life can come before them or make me do those 2 jobs any less. So, first things first, I'm going to quit Parents as Teachers. That job is A LOT of work, for a little pay and results. It takes up a lot of my time and yet my paychecks are so small all I can think is "What is the point?". So, that has got to go! Second, I am going to go back to school starting in the summer. I'm going to start taking the pre-requisites I need to get into the nursing program. It will be a hard 3 years or so, but I would rather do it now and be done then put it off until the kids are way more active in school and other things. I'll still be done with school by the time Sawyer is ready for kindergarten! Once I'm done with school, I can still choose to work part time or full time and it can be pretty flexible. I will be able to get a lot of grants for school since we don't make a lot and have so many kids. That will allow me to take out small student loans that we can live off of while I am in school and use those like a "paycheck" for me. It's not ideal, because it will give us more debt but it will allow me to not have to work at all while I am in school and student loans have low interest rates anyway :) Ultimately this career will allow me to make more and still be at home a lot. Plus, I've always liked gross medical stuff I've always just been too scared of failure to try nursing but I'm going to do it this time! In the more immediate future, we will hopefully be moving soon. We are going to try and keep our lives as simple as possible!

Friday, January 30, 2009

I'm going to make this job work!!

Lately I have been really frustrated with my job as a Parent Educator with Parents as Teachers. I don't see how you can call someone, set up a time to meet, and then they just don't show up??? Who does that? Apparently, a lot of people do! From what I have heard, this is fairly common in the beginning since I have all new families who have no clue about the program yet. I am starting to get several families though that I feel comfortable with, I have seen several times, and I feel like things are more established with them. I think if I can keep building up those families then everything will be fine! I really love the job when it goes how it should. When the families are home and I get to do a visit, it is so fun! It gives me a chance to totally make up my own schedule and get out of the house just a bit. Plus, I like seeing moms and dad's with their babies. I'm not babysitting or anything, I'm just watching them interact, sharing some info, and playing with them! It is going to work dang it!! I will make it work, but sometimes it is just frustrating!

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Maybe that's why!

I've been thinking and praying for quite some time now about what I'm supposed to be. I've been so frustrated with the fact that I can't find my niche. I've had so many jobs and tried so many different majors and nothing seems to feel right. I love literature, but I've realized that is just a hobby for me and nothing I really want to pursue any further than that. I find science and the medical field so interesting, but being there never really sparked an intense passion in me. My parents as teachers job seemed like it was going to be so perfect but now I find myself just thinking, "'s ok." I've been trying to figure out what is wrong with me. I keep praying to God to lead me where I'm supposed to be and show me what I'm supposed to do. I just came to the realization that I think He already has. God gave me a heart for a big family and I think what He is wanting me to do is take care of them and raise them. I keep feeling like He is saying to me, "Isn't that enough? What more could you want?" And when I really think about it, that IS all I want. I honestly love being home with my boys. I love getting them ready for school and making their meals and taking them where they need to go. I love sitting and watching a movie with them or playing cars with them or reading books to them. I feel like God is telling me that my calling is right here at home. Since I've been in this mindset, things have been great here at home. I look at what I do here as more of a "job" than I did before (and not in a bad way!!). I actually enjoyed making dinner this week, and doing the laundry, and making sure the house was picked up before Jason got home from work. I enjoyed doing these things not because they were expected of me (Jason is SO not like that) but because I really wanted to do them. It's a struggle for me to not work full time, I'll be the first to admit that, but Jason and I both like me being home and God has always provided for us and I know He will continue to do so. I actually feel very at peace for once.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Deacon and Truman are 4!!!

Well, they will be tomorrow anyway :) This time 4 years ago, we were in the hospital and I was in labor with those sweet boys. The day I found out I was having twins will always stick out in my mind as one of the most memorable days of my life. We went in for our 20 week scan and as soon as she sat that probe on my belly I saw 2 spines and Jason saw 2 heads. Just the nonchalant way the tech said, "Oh, looks like there's 2 in there." makes me laugh to this day. We were on no fertility meds and have no family history of twins so to say we were in shock doesn't even begin to describe it. And then to find out we were having 2 more boys just made my day! the months that followed were filled with extra doctors appointment, sonograms, non-stress tests, bed rest, and those little suckers trying their hardest to come out early!! But we held on and they were born at 37.5 weeks. The fact that I delivered my twins vaginally is one of the proudest things I've done in my life. Deacon Tobias was born first at 6:37am weighing 6 pounds even. Truman Xavier was born 13 minutes later at 6:50am weighing 6 pounds 5 ounces. And what a joy it has been to raise twins. I can't believe I have already made it through them being babies and toddler and have already gone through potty training them!! Honestly not a day goes by that I don't look at them and think "Wow! I have TWINS! There are 2 of them that grew inside me at once! How blessed am I??" This first 4 years has flown by as I'm sure the next 4 and beyond will as well. I just try to enjoy them every day. Happy birthday Deacon and Truman!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

My "green" baby

I kind of got interested in this whole "going green" thing when I was pregnant with Sawyer. We are not totally over the top or anything but I am always looking for ways I can help the environment. We use reusable shopping bags and cloth napkins. We have compact florescent light bulbs and don't buy things like bottled water that create unnecessary trash. You know, simple stuff like that. One of the main reasons I decided to breastfeed Sawyer was because not only was it good for him and it helped us to bond, but it reduced out waste. No huge formula cans to throw away. I also made all of his baby food for the same reason. Not only was it really good for him (and easy to do) but it made no trash since I made it in ice cube trays that I reused over and over. Recently, I have stopped using store bought baby wipes in favor of a wash cloth with warm water on it. Not only do I know exactly what is going on his butt (um..water!) but if leave nothing to throw away! You throw it in the laundry and use it again. With Elliot, we are even going to take things one step further and use cloth diapers. I love that they save money, but even more than that I love that they are good for our planet. We feel like it is our responsibility to do what we can to help! I hope we can keep adding things to the list of what we are doing to help!

Monday, January 5, 2009

It's a New Year!

I'm not really much of a person to make New Year's resolutions. I think they can set you up for failure if it is something concrete and you don't achieve it. So, I would rather adopt some changes in my way of thinking for the new year:

1. I want to be a better mom. I feel like I do a fine job, but there is always room for improvement! I just want to fully enjoy and appreciate these precious gifts God has given to me. I want to enjoy each age and stage because I know how quickly they grow and that the little people they are today will soon be a memory.

2. I want to grow in my relationship with God. I know He has a plan for my life and that He is already out there setting it all up for me. I want to learn to lean on Him and trust Him more. By doing this, I will be a better wife and mother.

3. I want to be a better wife. I'm the one person is Jason's life who should always be building him up but a lot of times all I do is tear him down. I want to support him and encourage him and recognize that he is who he is because God made him that way. God made him to be my husband and the father of my children, everything else is just details.

If I can adopt these 3 ways of thinking, I think 2009 will be a great year!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Deke and Tru are VERY interested in Elliot!

Deacon and Truman are so funny when it comes to all things dealing with Elliot. This is the first baby I've had where they have really been old enough to kind of sort of know what is going on. Brodie is old hat at this big brother thing by now, he does love to sit with his hand on my belly in the evenings and feel her kick. Sawyer is still in denial of the fact that he is no longer going to be the baby. But Deke and Tru are always asking me lots of questions about it all. "Why is you tummy so big, momma?" "What if I don't like baby girls?" "Can she sit next to us in the van?" All kinds of cute questions! Well, tonight we had the BEST conversation! 
*"Hey, momma, is the doctor going to cut Elliot out of you tummy?"
*"Well, hon, I sure hope not!"
*"Well then how is she going to come out?"
*"I'll push her out like this." (then I closed my eyes and acted like I was pushing)
*"You mean like when you go poop?!?!"
*"Yeah, kind of like that."
*"Is she going to land in the toilet?"

At this point, I lost it and was totally cracking up!! They were both dead serious about the whole conversation though. I'm glad they are so excited :)